You are what you... do?

The old adage about being what you eat is fairly on target. Our diet probably has more to do with our health and mood and longevity than we've traditionally given it credit for. But especially here in the great US of A, you are what you do. That's a popular first question after an introduction. What do you do, or what do you for a living? Essentially, we want your paid vocation as an answer. We presume you're spending 40-80+ hours a week at it, so it's a fair guess to assume that's pretty much who you are and what you're about. Throughout my years working through various trades and industries, people gave me (mostly) good natured chiding about always being in a new job or new sector. Fair enough. But I got exposure to a very broad scope of work and industries, and there's nothing quite like being in the driver's seat when it comes to experience. Hands on teaches like few things can.

However, since I did often edit the title on the resume for whatever work it was that I was using to pay the bills, I never really got married to a title. Frankly, I'm very grateful for that. Instead, I would often tell people what I was doing, but I used different language. For example, I might say, "Well right now I'm working for an earth moving outfit. Foundation and road preparation, landfills, and subdivisions. You know, basically all the big machines that moves a lot of dirt." That would tell people what I was doing. But I never said, "I'm a dirt man." My employers proudly wore that moniker, and rightly so. They were dirt men. They could see a clod a half-tenth out of grade from the cab of a machine moving 15 cubic yards of earth, and flatten it to perfection on their way by. People with professional careers often use this terminology. "I'm a welldigger." A pilot. A fireman, policeman, cattleman, framer, farmer, operator, roughneck, manager, or salesperson. It's a big part of your identity.

Y2K produced a beautiful little piece of cinema called The Kid. It's doesn't possess a great critical rating. But the idea is an adult Bruce Willis is inexplicably confronted by his 8 year old self. The "kid" wants to fly planes, be married to a gorgeous woman, and have a dog. But he's instead become a bluntly spoken image consultant, essentially telling people how to wear the professional mask that he himself has become proficient at donning. It's a heartwarming tale of getting the girl and the life you love by listening to the dreams of the little kid inside. The catalyst to getting off track, in the cinema universe, was of course the untimely death of his mother, followed by his father falling apart and blaming the young boy for her death. So up went the walls, and out the window went the dreams.

Here we return to my little chat about passion. No one follows their passion. Or if they do have a passion, say flying, it's an expensive hobby they can afford because they've made millions drilling for oil. Or maybe their parents produce steel in Asia, or their grandparents started a sewer pipe manufacturing company. The gist is, no one gets paid to do what they love. Not really. There's always a catch. And so we ask each other, what do you do? I've found that offering something like 'staring into the abyss to unlock the meaning of this finite existence' isn't much a conversation starter. Ok, so I've never hammered someone at a cocktail hour with that little gem just yet, but it's sort of like asking someone if they're ok. We want a fake smile, followed by a, "Yeah, I'm fine!" We don't want the real answer.

So, I offer two things. First, you are not the sum of what you do to provide income. You are many other more important things. Like a spouse, a parent, and caregiver, and so on. Being a provider is just one part of that equation. That said, it's a pretty damn crucial piece of the puzzle if you are able. So secondly, if you are going to do something, let it be something that is honorable and worthwhile. Something you are proud to expend your finite life in accomplishing. Now, I'm not often at my peak flow state when changing oil. But it's a worthwhile use of my time to extend the life of our expensive vehicles, and it's a valuable piece of knowledge to have and practice. People in skilled trades are likely going to move back towards the top of the pile when it comes to income. Willing hands that will repair and build infrastructure are becoming scarce, and have never been more crucial. Same for the people that grow food, provide medical care, bury the dead, and deliver products. All crucial, unsung jobs that absolutely have to get done to keep society working.

Over the years, we've thanked farmers, nurses, framers, truckers, and so on. When a crucial piece of the societal puzzle is strained or broken, we suddenly find our gratitude for those that keep it running. Some would say that we simply need to do the job we've chosen, thanks or no thanks, because no one is holding a gun to your head. Technically accurate, but not only is it nice to hear thank you, potential poverty is about as close to a loaded gun to your head as you can get. So we have to work and provide, or at least, I think we should. That said, I personally found value in being involved in a wide variety of work. I think there's value in being a truck driver for a while, even if you eventually go on to be an accountant for the bulk of your professional life. It offers perspective and a built in appreciation for the broad scope of work going on in the world. Young people often do this by working in department stores, restaurants, and university labs, but I think a stint in different work is valuable for society and for you. Maybe you don't want to pump septic tanks your whole life. That's fine. We need pros with years of experience, to be sure. But if everyone able pumped one tank, there'd be a lot of labor to go around.

That's my general feeling on life. I think you need to slaughter an animal, change a tire, and have a shit pay, blister producing job once in your life. I think those are now more valuable than a college degree, and society would be better for broad exposure to all. Now, like I said, we need people to find their "ikigai" and focus in for 30 years. I'm knocking on the door of 30, and I am pretty wound up about getting into the career that I can work on until I'm 60 so that I put my skills to their best use and earn my utmost in income to provide the best life for myself and my family. Ultimately, to leave the earth better for my efforts. I'm not where I think I could be, but I have no shame about any job I've ever held. For that matter, I don't harbor much shame about my failures in those jobs. I'm just barely getting to be a grown up. Kids fuck up, often royally, and it's how we learn. Many employers simply told me that my cost was going to be absorbing the fuck ups of the kids I hired on one day. I truly hope I can pay that back in kind as they suggested.

Timeliness, attention to detail, courtesy with customers, and care with precarious work were all hard learned lessons that are not easily forgotten. They got drilled in out in the "real world" with real money and real people at stake. Beats any simulation or college course, although both those have their uses and have in fact provided me value at one time or another. Being instructed in proper swimming technique is great, but getting hucked into the deep end will sure bring the gravity of the situation to your immediate, visceral understanding. Sink or swim.

We will always find a large part of who we are in what we do. Being a father is often expressed in home repairs, homework help, and cleaning up various bodily fluids. You are not a puke cleaner, but sometimes you do that job in service of being a father. Father is your identity in the family, but it comes with a lot of hats in the practical application. Hopefully, all those vocational endeavors culminate in the lofty status of a well lived life worth emulating. Likewise in my work, or even if I build a more specialized career, what I am doing to create income is just in service of being provider. Legacy builder. Root on the family tree. At the risk of sounding trite, there is no job too small. Nor an undertaking too big. The humility to wash feet, the conviction and commitment to bear martyrdom if destiny requires it. That's the example I had set before me. Likewise, I hope to always be able to calm my mind to be quiet and observe the world in the presence of my child, and yet be pushing myself to achieve the outermost limits of my professional abilities to both earn income and set an example of a life lived to the fullest.

You are what you do, but you aren't. You're more. I'm more. And I defy you to show me how it's wrong to want to achieve more. Not at the expense of my family, humanity, or the broader struggle that cannot be seen with the human eye, but in service to those monumental and crucial causes. That, to me, makes it worth spending your lifeblood to those honorable ends.

May you have clear vision to achievement. -C